a dream or a nightmare

The past few months, the land behind our property has been undergoing a transformation. Previously this land was a neglected site filled with trees, an abandoned foundation and whatever the owner wanted to dump. The land was purchased by a developer and he is in the process of doing an extreme makeover. We have watched in wonder as garbage was hauled away, 30 foot trees were toppled and boulders have been lifted from the ground. In a matter of months, houses should start taking shape.

I think that the five of us could watch the workers all day. We have been following the progress as if we were the developers. I am a process-oriented person and find the progress fascinating. Watching the tractor everyday is a kid’s dream. e even helped with taking down a particularly tricky tree.

As you can imagine, not everyone is thrilled with the project. I first heard about the development from one of my well-informed neighbors. She has many concerns including the safety of the land, legality of the plans and appearance of the proposed project. It is indeed tough to trade a quiet cul-de-sac for a busier street with 90% fewer trees. Oh, and did I mention the drilling? The property is on a slope supported by rock. In order to dig deep enough to build the foundation, the tractor had to drill through at least 10 feet of rock. I have to admit my fondness of the project fades a bit on drilling days. To my neighbor, this construction is a nightmare.

e and I are hopeful for the future of the development. Newly constructed homes with landscaping could be a nice improvement to the street. What would make it even better would be if our friends moved in to these houses. Anyone interested in a new home?

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recent encouragement

The other day the family and I video chatted with my mom. We got to show her what’s been going on around here and the first snow fall of the season (only a week after the superstorm, crazy!). In return, she showed us the progress she’s been making since her stroke. My mom’s been walking around, lifting a few pounds with her weakened arm and driving herself around some. She showed me her crochet and that she’s back to beading earrings. We praise God and are encouraged by how far she’s come in just a couple months. My mom knows that some of you have been praying for her and asked me to thank you. She is especially grateful to you.

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steady in the storm

As we watched the news Monday night, e and I were amazed at the power of the hurricane/tropical storm Sandy. No wonder we kept getting calls from family. Praise God, we didn’t sustain any damage, excessive flooding or power outages. Monday morning we ventured out to Costco to restock our empty fridge. The boys had some trouble walking in the parking lot but we made it home just fine. Tuesday night there was a sudden thunderstorm. For half an hour, sheets of rain fell and lightning was striking every couple minutes. Though it is nothing compared to other natural disasters, the power that blew through here was amazing. We are doing fine but please pray for those without power and facing damage and even injury. Thanks.

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the informal education

Since last I wrote here, I have been praying over my passions and my calling. I inquired about part-time work. I looked up auditing classes at nearby Tufts University. I sought godly advice. I commiserated with other women in my situation. I investigated degree programs. After all that, I have felt God confirming one thing–the one thing that had nothing to do with any of my efforts. I realized that my family is my priority. For me at this time, this means I am a stay at home mom while my children are at home.

Admittedly, I was a little disappointed. I could have been starting a new career–extra income couldn’t hurt. I could have been working on another graduate degree–adding to my skill set would have been fun. Perhaps down the line, God will give me these opportunities. Caring for my family is not in opposition to a career or further education. But I know that if it wasn’t in God’s timing and will, I would not be able to manage it whole heartedly.

I have been plugging along trying to give my best to managing a household, being a straight-talking, supportive wife and a nurturing mom. Other than being exhausting, it is really hard! Amid this, God has been showing me a little of why He’s put me where I am.

I met a teacher who asked if my son was the one who could explain how electricity works. One of my other kids exclaimed that he wanted to be a physicist after I explained light theory, how the human eye sees images and how a mirror works. (Many thanks to Mr. Brunner, my 12th grade physics teacher!) We have had conversations at home about phone etiquette, understanding the Bible, when to flip a pancake and what one plus infinity equals.

Yes, I am cleaning, cooking and doing laundry but I am also home giving my kids an informal education. It is by no means a glamorous or well paid job but I am grateful that that Lord is entrusting me with the responsibility. When I mess up, which happens often, He is there extending me grace.

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inversion

September brings many changes for us. It is as if someone grabbed my schedule and turned it inside out. All the boys are in elementary school now. There is silence during the day. No one gets to sleep in and we can’t afford to stay up “just a little longer.” I can hear my (very jumbled) thoughts. I actually have the desire to deep clean the house. I feel completely inverted.

Other changes are happening around me. My garden is receding as summer completes it’s transition to fall. My mom moved back home from the hospital. She has fully embraced the challenge of complete recovery from her small stroke. I received my bible study materials for the coming year.

After a week in CA, it was tricky reentering life at home and transitioning to all the changes at once. I wouldn’t say it was overwhelming but it was more like a steadily dripping faucet–low level, persistent, chronic stress. After two weeks, my body called it quits. Shut down. The first sick days of the school year. Thankfully, e was able to manage the kids for a couple days. Leaving him in charge of meals and the kids while I was in CA definitely boosted his domestic self-sufficiency.

I’m well again and am evaluating my inverted life. It could be that I’m approaching a mid-life crisis. Or less dramatically, I could be facing a transition to another season of my life. Whatever happens, I’m praying that God would clearly reveal my next steps.

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doing well & going home

Well I’m back in MA now. The week with my mom sped by. It was a surprisingly fun and relaxing week spent at the rehab hospital. I got to hang out with Mom and also my relatives who came to visit her. Who would have thought that helping one stroke patient would be easier than taking care of three healthy children?

Mom’s been doing very well with her different therapies. She’s regaining much of the movement on her left side and it seems to be getting stronger each day. Praise God. Of course it’s not nearly as fast as Mom would wish but I’m still grateful that she’s making so much progress. I have passed the baton over to my aunt who will be there for several weeks. The rehab doctors and therapists met and determined that Mom will be discharged on Wednesday.

It’s great that she’ll be home soon. It’s so much more comfortable than a hospital bed. Mom being home will be easier in some respects but will also present some challenges–furniture to be moved, some equipment to be purchased, grab bars installed and just adjusting to a different lifestyle, even if only temporary.

I felt similarly about coming home with a new baby. How would I manage caring for a new baby on my own without nurses on hand and meals that showed up when I was hungry? How was home going to accommodate the changes that happened in my absence? By God’s grace, we all adapted and I pray the same for Mom when she returns home. We would be grateful if you would pray also. Thanks.

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Mom’s progress

Hi there.

I realized that it’s rather dramatic to ask for prayer on a serious matter then disappear. I’ve gotten to CA without incident. My days so far have been spent with my mom. Though the circumstances bringing me here are not of my choice, I’m enjoying the time with her and my relatives who have been stopping in as well. Mom is gaining strength each day. Though she has a long way to go, the improvement is encouraging. Yesterday I transported her to the next step in her recovery, the rehab facility. They have made it clear they will put her though the paces. My mom’s determined to work hard and get better. We’ll see how the first day of treatments goes.

E seems to be managing things at home but it is understandably hectic. He’s been shuttling the kids around while still keeping some essential appointments. In addition, little k came down with a fever the day I flew out. Thanks to those of you who have been offering us help. Even if we can’t take you up on it, knowing you are there is comforting.

Your prayers for us are so appreciated. Would you please pray for the unbelieving members of my extended family? Illness and the shadow of death bring about lots of emotions in my family. I pray that this time would draw them to the reality of God.

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untethered

Yesterday we returned from our first family camping trip. I think you can count it a success if you omit the fact that O had a fever most of the time and that the lake had bacteria in the “at your own risk” levels. After a very full summer, it was a nice change of pace. The day we left we discovered that we had no phone coverage at our campsite. No phone, no internet. I was pleasantly surprised. I figured we could use a few days where we weren’t tethered to our phones or computers.

And it was nice…but I discovered that we did have a sliver of phone coverage. Just enough to refresh my instagram feed, receive texts and email. All incoming only. Being halfway untethered proved to be a mixed blessing. Friday I got a text from my sister saying my mom had a small stroke. I was mentally slapping my forehead (is that possible?) that I couldn’t get any messages or calls out to my family. Stroke. ER. Those are scary words. I drove out to civilization were I got to talk to my siblings.

We returned home yesterday and I am now preparing to leave again. Tomorrow I will fly out to be with my mom. She seems stable so far but will need various therapies to help her regain some strength to her left side. I will be away for a week. Decisions will need to be made about care, living situations, etc. It is hard to know if a week will be long enough.

I would appreciate it so much if you would pray for us. As far as strokes go, this is not that severe. Then again, a small stroke is still a stroke. Pray for wisdom as my siblings and I, along with my mom’s siblings, sort things out. Pray also for e as he will be home with the kids. (In the words of Evan, “Are we going to eat chicken nuggets?”) Most of all, pray that this would drive us closer to God. Thanks.

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summer camp–a typical day

Since we shared a typical day at Training Week, I thought it would be of interest to share a day at Summer Camp. There are actually three schedules here at camp. The Chinese speaking sessions and the Children’s Camp have complimentary but different schedules. The English speaking sessions have their own schedule: Junior Camp (younger youth), Youth Camp (older youth including college) and Young Adults.

The basic schedule for the English speaking sessions is this:

9am Breakfast
10:15 Morning topic: This includes worship with Junior Camp, Youth Camp and Young Adult Camp then breaks off into three speaker sessions followed by small group discussion.
1pm Lunch
1:30 Free time, huddles, crafts and “fun areas”
3:30 Afternoon topic: Just like the morning one but in the afternoon
6pm Dinner
8:30 Evening activity: Either worship and prayer, small group activity or large group activity
11:30 Lights out

The kids have been going to Children’s Camp so I’ve been hopping between their schedule and the Young Adult one each day. The children’s program primarily supports the Chinese speaking sessions as they are the ones with younger kids. The children’s schedule is like this.

7:45am Morning gym: The kids go for active group games which sometimes begin with running laps.
8:15 Breakfast
9:40 Morning stations: crafts, group activities, lessons, music
12:30 Lunch
1pm Free time
3:30 Open house: This functions like a supervised free time so parents can attend workshops.
5:45 Dinner
7:00 Evening activities: So far the kids have either baked cinnamon rolls, learned a dance or did role play.
8:30 Snack time
9:00 Bedtime

It makes for a busy day that begins early and ends late. The kids have been excited to attend everything but after three days they all needed naps. Morning gym is optional but my kids want to go so they can get a sticker for their achievement chart.

You might also notice that the mealtimes in the two schedules are staggered. The camp is so large that not all the attendees can sit in the dining hall at the same time. So they break up the time for meals into two slots and try to move people in and out rather quickly. Not on these schedules are also the leaders’ meetings in the morning and after dinner as well as the BCEC team meeting at the end of the day.

It may sound like a full schedule but it’s manageable. We are grateful for the opportunity to be here. I’ve been really encouraged by the people who have shared with me between those scheduled slots. They have a great love for their churches or have been through situations that have shown them God’s power in their lives.

Today is day three of camp. Our last day at the campsite will be Sunday. But before then, on Saturday afternoon there will be a baptism service. If I remember correctly, this the only time baptisms are conducted for all of these churches. In the afternoons, a class has been held for those who wanted to be baptized. All the attendees will go to the small beach by the dock where the pastors will baptize people in the lake. It has been raining most of the week so far so we’ll see what happens on Saturday.

Well that’s all for now! Better get some rest.

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Summer Camp–pondering culture

We are finishing up the first full day of Summer Camp here in Sweden. It is strange to type that as it seems so much longer than that. We now are sharing the campus with a total of 400 people. Ethnically, the attendees are Chinese, Nordics married to Chinese and the kids of the adults. It felt like the camp site became a small piece of China. I wrote something to this effect last year here.

As an anthropology major (quite a few years ago now) I find it interesting to ponder cultural differences. I get to see it play out right in front of me here in Summer Camp. I should mention that the Americans at camp are the only ones who don’t speak two or more languages. The kids and I are quite the oddballs here. We are Chinese but do not speak it, neither do we speak any of the Nordic languages. The children’s camp had to get translators for my kids since all the other children speak their Chinese dialect (Cantonese or Mandarin) and their Nordic language. They have to accommodate us.

Today there were a couple incidents that I’ve been pondering. During free time, my kids were bored found some empty soda bottles. Like most boys, they discovered they are great as weapons because when you get bopped on the head it doesn’t hurt. Of course, they didn’t think the loud noises the bottles a problem. Nor did they think the running around and shouting indoors would be an issue. A woman in her 50s saw them and started talking rather firmly to them. I was out of the room during all of this. When I returned, both the woman and my boys had odd looks on their faces. My oldest tried to tell her they didn’t understand. The woman tried Mandarin, Cantonese and a couple Nordic languages. I picked up a few phrases but since I don’t speak any of those languages, all I could do is repeat the word “English.” Sadly, that was the very language the woman couldn’t speak!

Later that afternoon, the boys and I were playing with the board games provided by the children’s camp. During free time, the games are made available and lots of kids hang out there. We must stand out to the other children since I was the only adult playing games and we speak English. Since we are so odd, children would come by to watch us and a few tried to talk to us. We didn’t mean to not respond, we just couldn’t say anything to them they would understand. One boy seemed to want to play Uno with us but we were in the middle of games so he proceeded to play Uno with himself at our table.

As an adult, I have enough experience to understand the cultural differences and language barriers. What I wonder is how my kids think about these incidents–if they are aware of them at all. I have heard that missionaries feel stress as they acclimate to another culture. Our time here is short enough that we do feel challenges of cross-cultural changes. What we don’t feel is the strain of cultural stresses. Missionaries on long term assignments probably have more training and preparation regarding cultural issues. I can’t help but think that they would still appreciate prayer.

Side note: Summer Camp is going well so far. We are tired but God is sustaining us. It is a lighter week for me as I don’t have to teach the kids. Officially, I’m a camp attendee but unofficially I’m praying that God would guide my conversations with those around me. I really hope they know English.

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