karenoch

Last month, we were prompted by our web hosting service that it was time to renew our account. We paid to keep this space alive, just barely alive. I seem to have this approach to a number of responsibilities in my life. The once lush grass is being taken over by crabgrass and assorted weeds. Real grass is in there, guys! Just enough so that I can call it a lawn. Last summer’s tomato plants, yes they did grow and produce a few tomatoes despite my inconsistent watering. My car–yes it’s still running. Sure the “check engine” light is on but it does that a lot these days. And didn’t my mechanic say it was ok? But I digress.

This blog is sadly clinging to life. If it could feel, I’m pretty sure it would need to see a therapist regarding my parental neglect. Blogs, what happened? Do we all just prefer Facebook to post snippets of our lives? The quicker, simpler forms of sharing win over maintaining a blog. It seems that if you keep up a blog these days, you (1) have written or are writing a book or (2) have your business/employment tied to blog traffic. Am I alone in noticing this?

So what about this blog? Why do I allow it to limp along? When I write, it is more than sitting down and banging out a few paragraphs. I have family life to share, thoughts that have been percolating, experiences to retell–when I write, I share myself. I’ve spent a few years wondering about the “public” me. I live a life that is open to a wider community. I have to decide what, where and how should I share of myself. It is risky. If I reveal myself, I am vulnerable.

Do I want to be vulnerable? That is an uncomfortable question to answer. (Just try that at your next dinner party.) No, I don’t often want to be vulnerable. Should I and do I? Yes, most certainly just not here. Will that change? Maybe. I’m thinking about it, especially since we just paid to keep this blog alive. 🙂

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